..::Yau Meh Lan ::..

Disenchanted - My Chemical Romance

2007-05-12T09:37:00.000+06:30

Without You Here - Goo Goo Dolls

Cant Let It Go - Goo Goo Dolls

hahha Wtf.!? DAM cute!!!

bitch!

Lost in love

2007-05-10T19:29:00.000+06:30

Hmm.. Haih Been dam down these few days. And now i'm sick. Headache. Maybe got fever. Think not. This morning wake up, whole body was aching. Aahh. Feel whole body dam tired and exhausted dam sick. -_-. This morning went college, really felt really bad. So went for bio class and i asked my fren wat is the optimum temperature for a healthy person. He said 37 degrees. So ok. I walked over to the drawer and took out a thermometer. LAB thermometer. U noe the one use to Put INSIDE a CHEMICAL. Yes the yellow shit. Nono, i didnt put it under my tongue. I put it under my arm pit =D. Haha. So came out, i'm fine. Then put back the thermometer without washing it :P. Yes i noe its disgusting. hahaha. But was too really sick and was trying to move around wifout teachheer noticing what i'm doing. But y am i feeling so dead sick. Haih.

Classes over at 1. Then called weng kit. Ask him lets go yam cha. So went ss2. yam cha cyber and all. Aih. Went kit starting to play dota starting to become a cyber dude. WTF?!. but haih. At least hes here when i'm emoing. when i'm down.

Tomorrow got maths test. Integration. Haih. HAte this chapter. I'll do anything topic of maths but differentiation and integration. I hate them. Sux. Somemore still feeling sick now. Argh!. Body still aching. Frens in college keep asking me "Oii Donovan wat the hell did u do last night?" then start showing me this really yam yam ham ham sap sap face. hahah. Haih.

Nvr msg her these few days. She nvr msg me these few days. Guess she really moved on. It was a sudden, everything becomes so cold. Wats happenning. Wat happenned? haih. been really not myself these few days. I miss her so much. But wasnt sure to msg her. I'm just disturbing her. If shes moved on, its useless for me to talk to her. She replys me coldly. Short. nuthing she could say. Nuthing i could think off. If everything just would have went back to normal. My phone credits. The digi. I send 15 bucks to her. Thought i wont be using digi anymore. haih.So much to say but nuthing seems to be coming out. Not sure. really not sure. Blank now. Listening to Disenchanted - My chemical Romance. and Please do download The River - Good charlotte. Its a nice song. Cuz erm not only the band is good. But Matt shadows from my favourite band Avenged Sevenfold and Snynester Gates Their lead Guitarist is playing part of the song too :P....hehe. They rock.

haih...i should be in maison now. Argh.Johan ask me go clubbing. So ngam today i dam sick. somemore got test tmr. Fuck lahhh.. Y do bad things always happen to me. If not i would be in da club now. Argh. Rums KL rite now live got some dancing performances. Live on tv. I should be there also>.<. Johan asked me go rums. Then dunno y change to maison. And now i noe y. But it doesnt matter cuz, I cant go!. aah!. Fuck this shit.

I dont love u - My chemical romance.

2007-05-08T19:17:00.000+06:30

Dam emoing with this song this few days. Haih. Guess its really the end. Dunno what to say. Should have done something, but i've done it enough. hmm. yea. Thats all now. Nuthing to say. Yea.

Dream Gurl

2007-05-06T14:49:00.000+06:30

Donny's Dream Gurl

Leah Dizon

Jia wei's Dream Gurl

Misa Campo

Ian's Dream Gurl

Only One - Yellowcard

2007-05-05T11:35:00.000+06:30

Been a tiring week. Very confused week. Until now i still don't know wat happen to me the last week since i last updated this blog. I don't know wat happened. Not sure.

Well last night, went out with fuckin kit. Was feeling rather down the whole week. Keep calling him to come out but he was busy cleaning his house. Renovating. so yesterday went out with him. Its good to have ur frens there. But still everybody is missing now. Wait till the end of the year when everybody comes back for vacation. Looking forward to it. Super drinking session.

So 1st we went cineleisure to watch spiderman 3. Wasnt that good as i was expecting. But still not bad. Some parts are really funny. Some parts emo sial. Anyway, I wanna be the black spiderman. Hes friggin cool. Dam yeng. All the gurls Go WillDdd.

Then after movie went Alimaju to yam cha a while. talking about some stuff. Then after that weng kit say wanna go cyber. I'm like Dude, Ure not a cyber dude!. The last time i went cyber with weng kit was in form 4. Where iw as in cyber 24 hours almost every friggin day. Was training up for the WCG. Pity him had to teman me. Playing there, then hes sleeping on the couch. >.<. So anyway We went rawang, Which is quite far actually. Maybe cuz the 1st time. But its far. haha. I thought rawang is in ipoh or in perak or watever-.-. or maybe johor. Cuz we went through the ipoh highway and saw this overbridge bridge which og fast food restaurant there. Then i'm thinking. Eh...this is the bridge i pass through when i go johor wif my family!. hahah But anyway rawang is still in selangor:P. So yea went there Cyber. Then after dat went mamak Yam cha. talk about lots of stuff. Talk about, Wat if weng kit and nocolo become super heroes. like weng kit is spiderman and nicola wonderwoman. It 'll be something like this.

His belly would be rreally big sticking out from the spiderman costume.haha.
then we playing cho tai tee. Then play until 2.30 a.m -.-. Told weng kit had to go home d. its getting late and my eyes are dam tired. So yea.then reach home at 3.00. hahah but had a good night. my buddies and brothers.

Me , ming jin , Weng kit.

Me and Weng Kit.

Talked to weng kit. Quite a stuff he said. Quite alot of stuff i was trying to figure out. and i'm not sure wats going on.shes moving on.Lawlz. He just said relllaxxxxx Take it slow and let the good times roll. So yea. Annndd this is a good song to emo with.

Only One - Yellowcard

Broken this fragile thing now
And I can't,
I can't pick up the pieces
And I've thrown my words all around
But I can't, I can't give you a reason

I feel so broken up (so broken up)
And I give up (I give up)
I just want to tell you so you know

Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only one
I let go, but there's just no one that gets me like you
You are my only, my only one

Made my mistakes, let you down
And I can't, I can't hold on for too long
Ran my whole life in the ground
And I can't, I can't get up when you're gone

And something's breaking up (breaking up)
I feel like giving up (like giving up)
I won't walk out until you know

Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only one
I let go, but there's just no one that gets me like you
You are my only my only one

Here I go so dishonestly
Leave a note for you my only one
And I know you can see right through me
So let me go and you will find someone

Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only one
I let go, but there's just no one, no one like you

You are my only,
my only one
My only one
My only one
My only one
You are my only,
my only one

Friday

2007-04-28T09:58:00.000+06:30

Ok. Just woke up. Suddenly decided to blog. No pictures for yesterday =/ slept at 3 this morning. Should i say came back at 3. anyway lets start off friday morning class. Maths. Aahh. Frustrating. I need to get the textbook. Then physics. Hmm. Didnt listen to what mr.ayeman was teaching. I was finishing up the experiment report. Haih. Feel so useless and stupid now. Hmm.

Then after that i went ac in the afternoon after my class. Was waiting for kevin and benji and johan. But johan i think he went for prayers. Couldnt call them actually. Both my phones battery were dead. Lawlz. Feel dam dam dam dam so lost . Carrying two phones. Look so yeng but, Haih no battery. So oh well. Was thinking should i call her? should i see her. shes having her break during dat time. Was scared to see her. Scared. Scared i couldnt hold myself. Scared she don't wanna see me. Scared i'll miss her alot. So kept thinking if i should call her until, her break was over. then aahh...shit. Think too long. Went back at 4.30.

Went home sleep a while. Then 9.00 went out fetch kevin and off to ac. Theres foosball tournament. So went and see the pros play. I feel so..so....such a big fat loser. -_- then come to think about it. these people sure no life wan. Everyday foos non stop until geng. Then again kinda feel proud :].i have lifeee. then went down makan makan. then went back upstairs.

She msged me, ask me where am i and all. She was in taylors college Hall. It was taylors Night. Then she say she might be going clubbing after that. And a dude say shes his responsibility. lawlz. Go clubbing. He might get really tipsy and theres road block. Its dangerous. So i offered her a ride. Offered if theres anything she could call me. I'll fetch her home. So yea i did. Saw her. Didnt dare to look at her for long. Scared that i might miss her too much. But shes moving on now, Shes letting it go. So it doesnt matter. I'll just keep how i feel to myself. so yea shes safe and sound. And i'm glad. Well at least she had lots of fun there, i'm pretty sure. Dancing and all. After all the stress shes been having, one night to have fun and relax. Thats good. :) . So then went back to ac. it was 12 already. And where teh fuck is Vincent. We came all the way here to drink wif him and now hes late. haha

Then a while later he came, and chill a while up stairs and off to drinking session. We didnt have liquor tho. kinda dumb tho. We have money to buy 4 buckets of beer and theres 5 of us but dont have money to buy liquor bottle -.- I noe a place in hartamas sell cheap liquors-_-. but oh well beer will do. Gassy drink. Each bucket 6 tiger beers. 5 of us. We're drinking as tho we're drinking water. Then a few kakis came in brought chivas =D. but i didnt drink that. I'm driving =D. Aku ni citizen baik. Ku tak drink and drive. Then it started to rain dam heavy. I was all wet. Kevin and me-_- cuz we were sitting a lil bit outside. Benji really wanna get drunk during dat night. Keep shoving me with drinks. Downing every dam bottle. He drank until he loss lil bit of his balance. haha dam funny but hes not drunk yet tho. Just tipsy. And kevin, he drink until he cant hold his ciggrate >.<. Oh then, the whole day in AC, from afternoon i was there then later at night i came until i was drinking downstairs, until i left. MTV is trying to kill me and kevin-_- Keep playing our emo songs. Haha. Funny was in the afternoon, MTV was playing The Kill - 30 seconds to mars. Then Kevin say this is now his top emo song. Then i asked how about the It ends tonight - All american Rejects. Also his emo song but not top. So then after "The Kill" song. They played It ends tonight -.- then we looked at each other and laugh.haha.emo sial. Emo lah ni...

So basically i had 8 hours of sleep -_-. Not enough. My eyes still tired. shes in taylors now. Doing her orphanage thing. Haha...playing puppets and all. haha. Coolez. ok nvm i shall post 1 picture here. My favourite picture.

Two Steps Behind - Def Lepard

2007-04-25T18:44:00.000+06:30

Quite lucky day in college actually. Bio class dismissed early. 11 o clock instead 12. Teacher said he got nuthing to teach already. tmr i'm gonna have bio test. So class dismissed early. So basically had break from 11. to 2. Thats 2 hours rite?. Or is it three. Or class dismissed at 10.30-_-. Erm anyway had a really long break. So went down to cafeteria to eat. Maggi goreng and Roti bakar. =/. Not a very nutricious food. This is wat u get in Segi. Sigh. moving on. Then some group of dudes came up to us and gave us this form. Where we fill in the particulars a few questionaires. Something like Are u a Rebel? How many times u lie to ur parents? etc etc. But wat the heck, u get a free file =D. So yea anything free to me its good.

After that went summit, wanted to watch movie But didnt have time cuz the movie will end at 2.30 and 2.00 is my maths class. Cant afford to skip maths class now. Teaching integration. Shitznezz. So went arcade instead. Went and play daytona. Rawr. i merejuking there. Nadzmi played cheat. he bangs people-.- Its not just once. ITS ALOT of times. 4 games in a row-.- was really pissed but dat time. But nvm dont care only. After that played the zombie Shooting game. And theres where i used up my money which was suppose to last me end of this week. Sigh. This suxorz. Well played a while. then went back to college. waited at the couch on tenth floor. Slept there. Ahh. the satisfaction.

Then during maths class, the file dat they gave me. theres quite a few shitsznesz inside. Dayumm.. theres bookmark, and the big balloon hitting thing dat produce noise dat people use in sport stadium. Example Badminton Matches. and calender. and other stupid booklets =D.

A BookMark which i will nvr use unless i feel like throwing this at someone.

The Dumb useless Booklet dat got picture of Amber Chia. I look left right. Turn book upside down insude out round and round side by side. I still Dont find her hot. or anywhere close to pretty.

I dont understand Mandarin. This is where picture comes in handy. Always include pictures in Instructions.

Waalla....Dats the Weird Balloon thing. Unfortunately I burst the blue one cuz i wacked nadzmi wif it too hard and my other yellow one....erm my dog burst it wif her razor sharp teeth which she used to bite on my steel fingers.

Hmm. I dunno wat i wan now I dunno wat i'm doing. Maybe i just really have to move on. did our story just ended just like dat? Is there really no chance at all. She replys coldly. She now thinks, maybe each time she msges me, i'll think i'll have a chance wif her. I dun wanna think this way anymore. Just see how things goes. Shes happier now i can see. Moved on. Thats wat i see. Rite now, i'll jsut be there for her. Probably she might think shes wasting my time. She always thinks this way. Shes not. Shes not. She was having stress last night. Msged me But i couldnt reply. I wasnt there for her. hmm. In the end some dude called her. made her feel okay again. Well...shes okay now. Her fren talked to her. Made her better. Me? i cant do shits. All i do is bring problem and trouble. shes moved on.

Tuesday

2007-04-24T18:50:00.000+06:30

Well, can start off by saying wat i did on saturday. Since Clubbing was cancelled. Called Weng kit up, lets go taman mayang. But how long i've known him, he'll come fashionable late. So called up kevin, told him i need to have some drinking session. So went over to his house, picked him up then we off to the houses near ac. yeap. We were quite cashless so all we could buy is 2 cans of carlsberg that taste like sparkling water. So we were sitting near the houses there sitting on the bench. Looking towards SJMC. Yes its directly opposite in front of us. Emo-ing session. Lawls. I miss those drinking sessions. Haih. I think probably my next BIG drinking session would be around october or november or december. Thats when kea leng, tristo, and ian is coming back. Yes lah. Cant wait. But its so long more. Dayum. Lawlz. Then later weng kit came. He said i was high. hahah. I'm jsut hyper. Happy to see my frens with me when i'm down. So i was just being me. Talknig crap and all. Then we went off to taman mayang. Nope we didnt race there this time. Haha. I had to pick up Benji. I still remember, me, hann and wengkit always race at nite. Haha. We'll stop at every traffic light next to each other car and wind down our window and start throwing rubbish into each other's car through the window. haha.. Good times. Well now, Hann is really busy. Seldom go out. Weng kit. hes in SOME island right this moment smoking his weed. Jia wei, still hanging out wif him no difference.Lawlz. Min ern, our cyber session XD. Ahh basically everybodys been busy.=/.

And i've been really stressed up. Feeling dat maybe studying isnt for me. I didnt do well for physics test today. I have no idea wat crap did i wrote on the piece of paper. Haha.

Thursday is a holiday i think. Installation of the agung thing. Hu wans to follow me attend this installation? Come on guys, be patriotic. Thats wat i learn in NS =D.

Today, was sitting the steps of my college. Stoning. Was thinking back. How did i get together wif her? Its quite unexpected. I remember i fetch her to her prom. Fetched her and her best fren, eve. It was raining dat day. Couldnt find the her school prom. Had to called up Sean to tell me where is it. I remember i couldnt drive properly dat time. Too nervous. haha. My palms were sweaty. I don't know y. Nearly lost control of the car. Haha. New year eve, Called her wished her happy new year. Didnt noe y i called. suddenly took my phone and dialed her number. Called her when i was outside kea leng's house in tropicana. Before we started our major drinking drunking session. Lawlz. Really unexpected. it all happen so fast. And now,

Once more I'll say goodbye to u
Things happen,
but we don't really know y
If its supposed to be like this
Why do most of us ignore the chance to miss?

Past

2007-04-23T18:16:00.000+06:30

I'm still living in the past. Still thinking i could change the imposibble. Still thinking that something would happen between us. Still thinking that i could get her back. Guess i was wrong. She totaly treats me as a fren Now. Worst come to Worst She treats me as a best fren. Which means theres no chance that i'm in her relationship ladder. Y? y? wat have i done wrong to deserve all this. I just want her back. I just want everything to go back to normal. She thinks i'm really happy now. Thinks that i would be able to move on with my life. Its very hard to move on when everyday i would just stone and remember the times we had. remember how we got together. Remember the little sms msg she sent to me few days before i asked her or couple with her. I'm really losing my confidence. She smsed me yesterday, i thought maybe we could have this chance. But from wat i read her blog. i dont think so. shes really letting go of it. Only thing bothers her is dat i'm not moving on. That i'm not happy. I'm still thinking...i'm still living in the past. Hoping somthing would happen. Something that could change everything. We could forget everything and start back from where we left off. I'm still thinking. Well shes really letting go dats for sure. Even the e-mail i sent to her. Doesnt seem to change anything. don't feel like blogging anymore. Don't feel like doing anything. I need to get wasted now. When is my next drinknig session? Get drunk get high. No worries. Lawlz. Well, watever she choose, i'll respect that. If shes happier better off without me, then i'll smile for her. Its just fate isnt it?. But sometimes i dont believe in fate. I rather say...fight for wat u want in ur life. Should i fight? or should i not fight? Well her decision her happiness..i'll smile for her

Down

2007-04-21T16:24:00.000+06:30

Shes so shattered,
Shes so lost,
Shes having so much stress,
College work keep pouring down on her.

Haih. how i wish i could tell her everything is gonna be okay. Everything will be fine. be there for her when everything just doesnt seem to go right. I'm missing her now. The thought of losing her is just so pain. Baby, will there be any chance? If i just could tell her she'll get through all this stress shes having easily. Go through it with her. But i cant, I shouldnt. She wanna let go. didnt wanna give us a chance. At least she have some of her assignments to keep her occupied. Probably not thinking about me. Y would she think about me. Thats ridiculous. Her work is more important. Yes at least shes concentrating on her studies. Slowly she'll just move on. And Everything would be the past.

Sigh, Not going clubbing d. Dam potong Steam. Stoopid Johan. When people got so much mood to do something...other things jsut have to ruin it-_-.

-Untitled-

2007-04-20T11:58:00.000+06:30

I think you can do much better than me
After all the lies that I made you believe
Guilt kicks in and I start to see
The edge of the bed
Where your nightgown used to be
I told myself I won't miss you
But I remembered
What it feels like beside you

I really miss your hair in my face
And the way your innocence tastes
And I think you should know this
You deserve much better than me

While looking through your old box of notes
I found those pictures i took
That you were looking for
If there's one memory I don't want to lose
That time at the mall
You and me in the dressing room
I told myself I won't miss you
But I remembered
What it feels like beside you

I really miss your hair in my face
And the way your innocence tastes
And I think you should know this
You deserve much better than me

The bed I'm lying in is getting colder
Wish I never would've said it's over
And I can't pretend
I won't think about you when I'm older
Cause we never really had our closure
This can't be the end

I really miss your hair in my face
And the way your innocence tastes
And I think you should know this
You deserve much better than me
I really miss your hair in my face
And the way your innocence tastes
And I think you should know this
You deserve much better than me
(And I think you should know this)
(You deserve much better than me)
(And I think you should know this)
(You deserve much better than me)
(And I think you should know this)
(You deserve much better than me)
(And I think you should know this)

She wanna let go, I have to respect her decision. Theres nuthing i could do. Even though thats not my decision, thats not what i want, that this isnt the end. Really thought we could give it one more try. Forget everything. Start from the beginning. I would do this. I would.
But if she wants it that way, i'll have to respect her. If shes happier this way, then i'll have to accept it.

Maybe she really thought that we could give it a try one more time. But i think in the end shes jsut scared. Scared that it wouldnt work out. It wouldnt work out how she wants it to be. I don't know wat to say wat to think now. If i could give her more security, more assurance that it'll work out. This wouldnt be the end. Give me ur hands and we'll run forever. A line from a song "Stay With You".Nuthing i can say now. Don't know wat to say. Don't wanna think so much. Just Hope one day we'll really forget everything and start back where we left off.

Tonight probably going maisons wif johan. Gonna knock myself out. And destroy my liver. If i'm not online then i'm probably in the club now. Lawlz. Hmm. She wans to go clubbing. haih. Y does she keep saying i'm wasting my time,Shes wasting my time. I'm not. Shes not. Doesnt she noe she really do mean alot to me. It doesnt matter whether its good or bad. But i nvr in my life felt i've wasted my time or even think about it.

Oh fuck...not gonig maisons tonight-.- Potong steam sial. Tmr nite only Go...Cipe hai.

-the end-

2007-04-19T19:16:00.000+06:30

If there's anything i could do,
I would change it,
But seems that,
what's done is done.
Maybe we didnt have what it takes,
Maybe we just don't have fate,
if you would believe.
Second chances nvr happen,
Cherish ur love ones,
dats my advice to you,
Nvr think so much during the relationship.
We had lots of problems,
All the ups and downs,
but seems that nothing brought us closer,
it pulls us apart.
If there's anything i could do,
i would change how i confront problems,
Sometimes we need to talk,
Sometimes we just have to let it be,
and hope everything will turn out better.
Shes moved on,
Life goes on she say,
and i have no idea wtf am i writing?
This is not a poem
and i still have the mood to crap here
Am i insane already?
y am i still writing this*fullstop*

Ignore the above. i dunno wth is dat. Lawlz. Hmm. Well seems dat its really the end. Theres no turning back or second chance. She really do wanna move on. Couldnt handle the relationship we have, the problems we encounter together. Shes moved on. Hmm. i guess after we break up, i'vee been the one so foolish. "Clap one hand"yea. i don't know how to explain dat. But well something like dat. if there's anything i could do, i wanna start somethign new wif her. But memories haunts her. Not confident that it'll work out. Not confident that it will turn out like how she thought it would.

If just we could start something new, forgets the past. maybe give another try and make it really work out, Dats wat i thoguht at 1st. But guess its the end now. She wans to let go, she wans to move on, i'm back at square one. Maybe fate will bring us back again.

Someday - Michael Learns to Rock
*hey i like oldies ok..thhey're classic*

In my search for freedom
and peace of mind
I've left the memories behind
Wanna start a new life
but it seems to be rather absurd
when I know the truth
is that I always think of you

Someday someway
together we will be baby
I will take and you will take your time
We'll wait for our fate
cos' nobody owns us baby
We can shake we can shake the rock

Try to throw the picture out of my mind
try to leave the memories behind
Here by the ocean wave's carry voices from you
Do you know the truth
I am thinking of you too

Someday someway
together we will be baby...
The love we had together
just fades away in time

And now you've got your own world
and I guess I've got mine
But the passion that you planted
in the middle of my heart
is a passion that will never stop

Well this song explains how i'm feeling now.Hmm. But good song tho. Good band. Been listening to them Since i was very young. In my dad's car. Everytime theres a road trip he'll play all this oldies classic hits songs. yeap..Hm..haih. I cant type much or blog much this moment, no mood. Plus i have maths test tmr. Yay. Wee. bobbie gonna fail us.

Sunshine

2007-04-18T18:55:00.000+06:30

Well today, went to college as normal. Normally wednesday for this semester would be one hell of a fucking day for me. 4 hours of bio and 3 hours of maths. Non Stop. So yea. Only two subjects but long hours continuosly. Gonna die someday. But fortunately, our retarded weird extremely large looking biceps maths teacher, Bobbie was on MC. So yea we basically over at 1.

Then Noah came and pick me up. Its been quite a while i went out wif him. So he came to my college picked me up. We wanted to go KLCC-.-. he said he wanted to do something special...ookkkayy..dats gay. but its far so in the end we went ou instead. Didnt noe wat to watch actually. Dunno which movie to watch.

Were deciding whether to watch, Hannibal Rising, Perfume, or Sunshine. But don't know how we end up watching Sunshine. *WARNING* don't read further if u dont wnana know wat happen in the show*WARNING*

Overall i'd give it a 3/5. good movie. Depends on wat do u like actually. So yea. Erm Michelle Yeoh is inside. No shes not hot. Shes old now. Old old Old. and she died in the end :P. Oops i accidentally terspill the story..Oh Well~. so yea shes acting as one of the scientist who is crazy of the plants and provides oxygen and all. And die looking at one. Y am i only talknig about her?. Dats because I only know her name and not others. =D.

Well this movie is about the Sun is dieing. and Expeditions have been sent to save the sun be re-bombing it and all. So there was this dude in the expedition whot hinks hes the gods messenger or something and start killing everybody.

Y do i give such low rating? when its such a good movie. Well because, theres not enough killings and muderings dats number one. Secondly. I dont like movies dat in the end everybody dies. Yes if you're reading this, i have just spoil ur mood to watch the movie. so ur loss. Gave u all warnings already.

Its been quite a stressfull week for her. Having so much test and assignments to due. Worried about her. Worried about her health getting affected. She didnt have enough sleep. Scared it would be a breakdown. But i noe she'll get through it.:). haih. I dunno hows things now with her. Hopefully it'll get better. Shes still avoiding. i guess. I dunno. Well nuthing much to say now. dats dat. Chow chow.

Buffet Dinner

2007-04-14T20:01:00.000+06:30

Today woke up around 10 or 11. Not sure heh. Went online kacau a few frens. Then after that i went to taylors college and reach there at 12.25 =D. Went there to see her. :). But she was busy playing and bullying the orphans there =/. hahah until she came out late and saw me at 1 instead of 12.30 =/. Her break was only 12.30 to 1. Only half and hour get to see her. Then we went mcdonald buy ice cream eat. Ok only Me bought ice cream and ate. haha. Rawr i still want ikea ice cream. Cheap and nice =D. oh then we went back ac played wif her pool. Yes its bang balls =D. haha. Tell her to shoot straight the ball will go sengit. Tell her to sengit, the ball will go straight. -.- hahah. so next time when really need to shoot straigh i'll just tell her to shoot sengit, then her ball sure go straight and...SCORE!. haha. Can hear fireworks in my place now. Dunno wat those ppl shoot those fireworks for. Wat a way to waste money. If Ure too rich u could give me some instead of spending on stuff dat are pointless. Might as well give to those hu needs them, like me =D.

After that, at nite went dinner with parents. Eat buffet dinner in shang ri la in KL. haha. I wouldn't consider the really best looking hotels, But i still prefer KL hilton. Nope not the PJ hilton. The KL Hilton. yes fucking beautifull. haha. So yea the buffet wasnt really good. I mean i wouldnt say its really good. Its just average. Not much choices of Food. Compare to this Japanese Buffet Restaurant in Star Hill. Dat is the bomb but the cost is like a bomb also -.- So few pictures i took. and i'm using fully my phone camera. haha. I use it with full extend, i make use of my super clear cybershot camera phone XD. Muahaha

My 1st Dish. Fried Rice. Fried Wantan. Egg Tart.Fried Prawn. Siu Mai. And this Weird fuzzy with crispy string wrapping a chicken thing. Yes the combination is weird. But its edible.

Next, Lobster tail, Salmon, and my favourite Scallop. Yum Yum.

Then I went for an Indian Cuisine. satay, Roti canai, and the keropok thing.

And my desert =D. From picture it may not look nice. But its Ok i guess. Cuz memang not nice. haha. Ms Reed or Bakerzin in OU has better cakes. =D

Vanilla Fountain thing. doenst taste like vanilla tho.

The Chocolate Version. BIGGER version. twice the size of the Vanilla one.

My sista bathing her mashmallow in dat fountain.

The tower of Seafoods. Yes u cant see them. Cuz i was lazy to go up there and take the pictures.

Girrafe thing. Not edible tho. Just saw it behind some glass door. So took a picture.

My Love.. hahah. Cute rite. I have no idea wats those two thing is Pig i think. Or maybe a rat-_-

Wheres weiyang? I miss u bitch head. XD

Was happy i could see her again today. even played pool. Watever happens..happens. Just see how it slowly goes.

There were times it slipped away. There were times i couldnt hold myself back. i dunno. This isnt over for us. I noe it. Gave her a hug before i went home. Wanted to hug longer. But scared later father see then i hai lat. or she mgiht shout i pok mong.><. then i lagi hai lat. Tried to hold her hand but it slipped.

Missing You

2007-04-13T18:22:00.000+06:30

Yo. Didnt blog much these days. Been really busy wif assignments. erm i mean last minute assignments :). Malaysia studies folio Project and then last minute preparation of the presentation. Haih, and of cuz i manage to finish all of em and make it look really good. hehe :). And then Maths homework like hell. Now this second semester our maths is so much harder. We're learning something i have always hate. Differentiation and Integration. Dat really suc huh?. Rawr. Worst is theres no rest to all this, next week having tests. Our 1st test which is 10% of the finals. Ah! Bobbie say we're gonna fail our test 1 maths. Wtf?! If its too hard then don't give so hard lah! Give easier help us to pass lah bitch!. Rawr.

I got back my finals results for last semester. Wasnt good. Kena lecture by dad for 2 hours i think. Talking about family history. Haih.

And no pictures on this post today. Cuz theres nothing nice or interesting pictures to be taken by my wonderfull 3.2 mega pixel phone =D. better than 2.0 mega pixel :P. la la la. Aaah Ian went back to langkawi. Bored! now weekends sure seldom go out d. haih. Nvm i stay home study be good boy =D.

Went Ac today. Went to see her. was really happy that i could see her But, when she comes close, when i held her hand, i felt something from me lost. I missed her hugs. I really wanted to hug her during that time. But i shouldnt, we're not together anymore. I hope we could. I miss her hugs, miss her pecks of kisses, i miss her. But holding her hand even just for a while or not even really hold, a touch probably, i felt like the time stopped. Her small hands and fat fingers :P haha kidding. The ones i always hold. felt that shes here all along. well we'll see how things goes then.

Been watching bleach. Dam good anime show. Yes donovan do watch anime. Wats wrong wif dat freaks. I watch Samurai X, Naruto, and bleach =D. but still like samurai X tho. yeap yeap. Naruto, still waiting for the episodes to come out at the video store. Everytime go also they dont have-.-. Bleach downloading from internet. Everyweek one episode -.-. Nono i'm not downloading. I dont do such work. All these keh leh feh work my sister do wan =D. akaka. I still find Naruto very very interesting tho. Argh i need to watch from episode 161 until where the latest episode now. still so far behind .=/ oh well, Theres this new game i bought Comand and Conquer 3: Tiberium Wars. Yeap shall go play it now. =D

The End or the Beginning?

2007-04-07T22:08:00.000+06:30

We broke up. Well theres nothing i could do. She told me to respect her decision. So now i did. Even how much i wan her back how much i wish we could just be back to normal and forget everything else. But its her decision. I have to respect that. If shes happier that way, then i guess this is the way then.Shes feeling lost. Maybe shes not use to it. But i can see she'll be ok just a matter of time. forgets me. Sigh.

Its not her fault, probably my fault. For not able to make her fall in love with me. Hmm. And i'm still hoping that i could get her back. Is this a foolish attempt?

Ian is going back tmr. Sigh. Gonna miss my hairy gorilla. Hope hes fine After breaking up wif Yun zhen and all. Sigh. The story he told me was very, erm unbelievable. I mean, The monk is freaking ChUN! i Mean he noes Like Yunzhen's personal life without knowing her!. Thats freaky. Anyway maybe u guys could meet him and ask him for some lottery number since hes so good. Hes in penang by the way. Ian is coming back after 6 months. Probably thats when Tristo comes back. Yay.

Well we'll see how things goes then.

EVo..Dunno hus car is that. Dunno hus the fellow but i sat in his car =D

me and fattie Cheong. Dam cute rite his cheecks =D

Someday

2007-04-06T15:05:00.000+06:30

I have express my feelings, I have no regret, I hope she understands how i feel.

Someday-Michael Learns To Rock

In my search for freedom
and peace of mind
I've left the memories behind
Wanna start a new life
but it seems to be rather absurd
when I know the truth
is that I always think of you

Someday someway
together we will be baby
I will take and you will take your time
We'll wait for our fate
cos' nobody owns us baby
We can shake we can shake the rock

Try to throw the picture out of my mind
try to leave the memories behind
Here by the ocean
wave's carry voices from you
Do you know the truth
I am thinking of you too

Someday someway
together we will be baby
I will take and you will take your time
We'll wait for our fate
cos' nobody owns us baby
We can shake we can shake the rock

The love we had together
just fades away in time
And now you've got your own world
and I guess I've got mine
But the passion that you planted
in the middle of my heart
is a passion that will never stop

Hold On

2007-04-05T17:32:00.000+06:30

Don't say i deserve someone better. I choose u, and i choose to be with you, i want to share the happiness with you, I choose u cuz ure the best and theres no one better, Doesnt that make any difference? that you really mean someone to me, that you're the best thing ever happen to me.

Living on a Prayer - Bon Jovi

2007-04-04T18:25:00.000+06:30

Tommy used to work on the docks
Unions been on strike
Hes down on his luck...its tough, so tough
Gina works the diner all day
Working for her man,
she brings home her pay
For love - for love

She says we've got to hold on to what we've got
cause it doesnt make a difference
If we make it or not
We've got each other and thats a lot
For love - well give it a shot

Whooah, were half way there
Livin on a prayer
Take my hand and well make it - I swear
Livin on a prayer

Tommys got his six string in hock
Now hes holding in what he used
To make it talk - so tough, its tough
Gina dreams of running away
When she cries in the night
Tommy whispers baby its okay, someday

We've got to hold on to what we've got
cause it doesnt make a difference
If we make it or not
We've got each other and thats a lot
For love - well give it a shot

We've got to hold on ready or not
You live for the fight when its all that you've got

Everything is falling apart now. Still fighting with parents. trying to talk to someone nicely but they just seem to shoot u back. I'm tired. really tired. But i Dont wanna give up. Are u still here?

Look mat chat?

2007-04-03T16:54:00.000+06:30

Sorry about the title, didnt know what to put.-.-

Where should i start? Well nothing much happen, just about and carlston and shereen thing. Well hopefully they're okay ler. I shouldnt campur tangan. Just stay and listen to their whinings thats all =D.

Yesterday went ou to wif carlston,shereen,arvin, wai xiang, and this 1 more dude. Went at 11 something and thought we would go back early but, no, we went home late. It was 5.30. i was so tired, I wanna sleep. just buy one fellow's present also take so dam long>< somemore guy. Simply buy one thing can d ler. Buy hamper then we all can share but got expiry date. Or you want something special. Yes something special that no one have ever give before.

Vacuum Cleaner

The new Osim Vacuum Cleaner.

Anyway in the end we got him. Erm, ok i forgot what we got him. I think we bought him an ashtray.-.-. So yea. Then went home,carlston came my house chillin there. haih, cant sleep. Y? cuz hes in my room. i cant sleep when visitors are in my room. Just afraid my ass get fucked =D.

Today, i went ac to see nikki, after my classes, gave her something =D. Hopefully she likes it. Altho she have so many of those, her room and bed is filled with it. Like compact all into one room. :). And now tonight i 'm going to finish up my malaysian studies assignment. Sigh. My group got some indian bar part time worker dude. Doubt hes gonna do his part. I'll just have to do double work. So thats all now.

My new ride! This baby here will guarantee my victory in the next Grand Prix.

and also to fetch my dear nikki =D.

Poser sial. All black, All jeans, but 2 chinese ass 1 hairy black ass.

Eh terbalik the picture wan.

The Kings of One Utama.

King Arvin

King Fattie

King Donny. Wheres my Queen?

Tired

2007-03-31T10:33:00.000+06:30

Aahh.

No pictures again. Nothing nice to take. Yesterday after seeing nikki in ac, went off to ou with Jia wei and eugitta. Hes bald.Back from Ns =D. We watched Mr.Bean. haha. Retarded wei>.< But dam funny ler. Rowan Atkinson dam good actor.

Then after that went home. Then waited for Ian to fetch me to go ac :) .
hes going back on 9th of april. sigh..

Anyway, hope my fren having his depression problems ok now. I hope he don't do something crazy. Like the last time. =/. Sigh. Maybe going out wif noah now. Then i shall see if i can get any nice pictures any post here later k. =D be right back then~

Let Love In

2007-03-29T17:04:00.000+06:30

Whole day i've been listening to this song "Let love In - Goo Goo Dolls". awesome song. love this band. First time i ever heard of this band and their songs, was recomendation from weiyang. =D hes a goo goo fan. Oh i remember watching their last concert Dvd in his house on his projected screen and sheep fur carpet. Yes Sheep fur. Soft. Furry. Sexay. Its quite nice to roll around dat carpet. Weiyang if you're reading this ure a gay fag, and u got owned by me. Noob. U aussie dickhead freak chicken feet cunning lingus person.

Anyway, I shall be really honest and straight forward. I wanna tell u all this but maybe it doesnt mean much to u guys but it mean alot to me. First of all i wanna say i'm sorry. No matter wat i'm telling u now, i hope u guys understand and support me. Now the truth is dat, and truth dat might hurt people, is dat, Today's post I wont be having any pictures on it =D. Wahaha. Got u guys suprised. Muahha. Suspense!?!?!?.. Yea ownage.

Anyway, yea no pictures cuz this week was my final exams week. Had my maths physics and tommorow my chemistry. So i was being a good student doing my part. studying and all. So no time to take pictures. =D.

Having quite a week now. I realise ppl are always selfish. Humans are selfish. Y do some individuals just love to judge other people when they themselves isnt perfect. But they do think they're perfect tho. Thats y they think they could judge other people. But not only judge, they would also backstab and spoils other good couple's relationship. They just have to put their fat bitching nose into everything.

ok lets chill now. Breath. Breath Breath. Mutha fucking suffering bitches. $#@^#&*#!%#6*censoreed*31~@%* *tooot**tooot*tooo*. -___-

As i was saying, This group of societies should be burn in hell. And one day they will get their karma. Yes. Every ehard of this song by justin Timberlake, What goes around comes around. Yea in ur faces!

Anyway back to studying, gonna update later

Creed

2007-03-25T12:23:00.000+06:30

"My Sacrifice"
Hello my friend,
we meet again
It's been awhile,
where should we begin?
Feels like forever
Within my heart are memories
Of perfect love that you gave to me
Oh, I remember

When you are with me, I'm free
I'm careless, I believe
Above all the others we'll fly
This brings tears to my eyes
My sacrifice

We've seen our share of ups and downs
Oh how quickly life can turn around
In an instant
It feels so good to reunite
Within yourself and within your mind
Let's find peace there

When you are with me, I'm free
I'm careless,I believe
Above all the others we'll fly
This brings tears to my eyes
My sacrifice

I just want to say hello again
I just want to say hello again

When you are with me I'm free
I'm careless, I believe
Above all the others we'll fly
This brings tears to my eyes
Cause when you are with me I am free
I'm careless, I believe
Above all the others we'll fly
This brings tears to my eyes

My sacrifice, My sacrifice

I just want to say hello again
I just want to say hello again
My sacrifice.

Crrazy on Creed's songs now. Download Higher - Creed, With arms wide open - Creed. They Rocks the Socks

Budget Plan

2007-03-23T20:13:00.000+06:30

Today is the 23rd of March and there is exactly 8 days more till i get my allowance. And i only left like, 50 cents in my wallet, i doubt it can buy me anything but just ice tea. Sigh, how am i gonna survive for 8 days with just 50 cents. I need a budget plan.

After listening to hitz dot Fm about their budget plan, i've came up a few budget plans combining theirs.

The Amazing Incredible Super Duper Hyper Luper Budget Plan! -created by Donovan. =D

Don't eat in college

If you have to eat, sit with a bunch of frens in the canteen or anywhere else like mamak, and take a lil bit of each fren whos eating.

Borrow 20 or 10 cents from anybody u see in college, People wont ask u to repay them 10 cents, unless they're gay.

If you're using prepaid, miss call people so they could call u back but in my case i dont use prepaid, this doesnt affect me =D

If you do not have any cash to pay for transport to somewhere near like maybe, Asia Cafe or Sunway College, Consider walking. Its free!

If its far, forget about it, u'll die walking.

Sneak thru the back door of the cinema.

If you smoke, and u dont have cash to buy ur own sticks, just simply "pau" from frens.

Try to stay home, u wont spend any money there.

If you play guitar, go to the street and play a few songs and earn a few coins

Or u could take a radio, play "Mr. Bombastic" and dance in the street wearing and looking like him below!

Aren't I sexy? Mr.Bombastic! Mr.Fantastic!

Hehe...Duuhh..hehe....Weee~

Oh yea, Mr.Bean Holiday, came out yesterday. I wanna watch it badly but i ahve no cash. Wat do i do? Hmm.. think.. yes i noe sneak thru the back door. Nah, wont do dat, i'm not dat cheap =D. But yes i wanna watch. Rowan Atkinson is a fucking good actor. Hes the Best i ever seen, the one i admire most. Hes just so good that he could make a retarded face funny. *thumbs up*

*Shows the middle finger*

Annnywaaay, today i went ac, To see my dear. Nope, i didnt walk there this time. I took a bus =D. And i would say, malaysia's bus system have improved. =D. Now they have air con in the bus. How Cool is that!? Air Con Dude! Anyway its more colourful and prettier and cleanner. This was the 1st time i ever took a bus since, since, since, wait. i'm not sure if i have ever took a bus. Ok anyway, well i have a car and i normally drive and now due to few incidents happened, i dont get to use the car anymore. Well not anytime soon. Sigh. No cash, no car, no credit card, but got condo. Gurls are gonna laugh at me. How am i gonna survive wifout my car and cash?. sigh. I cant face the world like this, i'lll just cover my face everywhere i go now.

Embarrassment!

Cashless

2007-03-21T18:34:00.000+06:30

I''m getting poorer and poorer each day. I have no idea how i spent 50 bucks today which was suppose to last me until next week. Haih, being cashless just isnt a good thing for me. Cuz i would really feel lost and alone-_-. Sigh. Money is not everything But without money, thers nothing. Am i saying it correctly?. Oh well.

Went to college at nine today. Went up to the libray to borrow a few books. Erm ok. One Book. Then after that wanted to take taxi and off to sunway college but i had to be budget and shall not use so much money. So decided to walk from my college which is next to Summit and to Sunway college. Yea its far. It was a 20-30 minutes walk. Didnt mind walkin tho. Cuz of the satisfaction u get from not spending any cash. =D. annnd its not sunny,its windy.=D .

Then met wai xiang in college.He had to go for his class. So i took a visit at the student centre and played foos=D. the rods still stink like hell.Then went to some pan mee shop and ate there wif the rest of the people.

Cheryl got into an accident. yeap. Nuthing much. Just a minor. Erm major. headlights kinda got smashed. She was trying to take my name as the Sunway Drift King But unfortunately she failed. =/yeap. So picked up nikki at taylors and head off to piramid. we went ice skating =D. and i can say is that, its a waste of money..-_-. Drinks was around 10 bucks. Entry fee for me and dear was 22 plus 10 for gloves. 42 bucks-.-. this suck... Stupid ice skating thing. But i had a good time wif her=D. Ice skating. see Dear, u can skate ler, better than wai xiang =D. Wai xiang is just fat, so his center of gravity is low. The weight acting downwards on him will prevent him and increase the resistance to fall. So its cheating. =D But didnt mind being totaly cashless now. At least i spend time wif my gurl =].

So yea here are a few pictures,like i promised capturing wif my k800i phone *smiles proudly* =] and the bloggie being a bitch for uploading this pictures really slow. Grrrr.

Beers that the Machas were drinking. With straws.-.-.

Wai xiang trying to rape his drink there. Scooping and sucking. I think hes practicing to be gay =/

And for this, wai xiang just got an orgasm while drinking his chocolate drink.And cheryl was disgusted.

Wai xiang trying to prove hes retarded and me as a good fren keep convincing hes not.=/Sigh. Sometimes i just wanna help my retarded frens. =/

And lastly the book that will guarantee an A for my physics =D. Yes this book does many wonderful amazing thing. Look it even have a BIG A on its cover book. Thats wat i'm gonna get when i just simply touch the book

Tonight We Dine in Hell !

2007-03-18T23:54:00.000+06:30

Today, went ou watch 300 with noah and ian. Dam its a freaking awesome bossum movie. I'll give it 4 out of 5. Y is it missing one point? Cuz theres lots of scenes that are cut off. =/.

Spartans have the finest warriors. They fight half naked revealing off their nipples. No body armor. Well less armor, more mobile. agile =D Anyway, its a good movie and very gruesome too. Suggest everyone to watch it as soon as possible. Or maybe could get the dvd instead. Its uncensored *smiles*

Don't you think they look sad?=/ Immortals. They're ugly wicked men who knows no sympathy. They don't blink an eye when they kill people. In this movie, these immortals happen to be really ugly ass looking men. Like they have been tortured and burnt. And they come in thousands. Persians got quite a lot of ugly fucks dont they. Y must immortals look like shit. Y dont they have some pretty men in dat suit.

Persian King. Hes freaking tall and he stand in a gay position.

Anyway yea awesome movie. Worth ur time and money.
Was talking to my dear last night. Happy that she told me something now. Sharing stuff with me. She told me she hugged ah boy as his birthday present. Well its ok i guess. its just a friendly hug. Ah boy told her that he wans her to be his gf for one day. I mean yea hes crossed the line but thinking of different perspective. hes quite cham loh -_-. As long he noes hes limit its ok.

Sometimes i say something now,it just suddenly hit my head on something. Assurance. Maybe i'm just thinking too much. Take it slow, give her some time heh. As long she tells me shes right back in my arms.

Slow

2007-03-18T10:28:00.000+06:30

Hmm,quite a depressing post lately. Oh but wait,ive started to blog again. This time i'll guarantee there will be pictures with my k800i phone =D. Everything seems to be okay now. Well, slowly at least.

Hmm, tomorrow actually is our 2nd month anniverassary. lolz. haha. hmm.. Shhh... =D...tmr monday rite?. Yea Shhhh =D. Wanna watch 300 badly but got lots of assignment. Ian better wake up now. Need to go buy tickets d. Nvm i shall spam his phone. I'll talk about mroe stuff later...now enjoy few of the reunion pictures me and my besties took and which i stole from their computer =D.

Akon's Night-everybody was crazy high. lets see hus in the picture. Me=D,fucking kit,jia wei,kazzy,alex,ka young,tristo,ming jin, and others i cant identiy.cant see their dam face. Ian is missing from the picture.

Our Amazing reunion night. Some different. A thing to remember. Ian is missing from the picture.

After all that drinking had to go mamak to drink limau ais. So dont get road block-.-. Ian is still missing from the picture. -_-

Theres still lots of fucking pictures. But tristo i think kena chopped in new zealand and forgot to send us the pictures. so yea =/

Could we continue back where we left off?

2007-03-17T14:20:00.000+06:30

-Love Will Come Through-

If I told you a secret
You won't tell a soul
Will you hold it and keep it alive
Cause it's burning a hole
And I can't get to sleep
And I can't live alone in this lie

So look up
Take it away
Don't look da-da-da- down the mountain

If the world isn't turning
Your heart won't return
Anyone, anything, anyhow

So take me don't leave me
Take me don't leave me
Baby, love will come through it's just waiting for you

Well I stand at the crossroads
Of highroads and lowroads
And I got a feeling it's right

If it's real what I'm feeling
There's no make
believing
The sound of the wings of the flight of a dove

Take it away
Don't look da-da-da down the mountain
If the world isn't turning
Your heart won't return anyone anything anyhow...

So take me don't leave me
Take me don't leave me
Baby, love will come through it's just waiting for you

So look up
Take it away
Don't look da-da-da- down

If the world isn't turning
Your heart won't return anyone anything anyhow...

So take me don't leave me
Take me don't leave me
Baby, love will come through it's just waiting for you

Love will come through
Love will come through
Love will come through

Confusing whether ure like me, confusing whether u still wanna be with me. Take ur time, Slowly think, Just hope we could continue back where we left off.

Slipping Away

2007-03-17T08:03:00.000+06:30

Seems that shes slipping away from me,
shes afraid to hurt me,
she thinks shes not worth it,
shes pushing all the blame to herself,
Shes losing her confidence,

Baby, dont think this way,
Be confident,
This is not ur fault,
Ure the best thing ever happen to me,
I'm lucky that i have met u,
i am lucky to be with you,
u showed me light when i'm in the dark,
Baby,be confident,dont think this way

We could give it another shot,
I noe ure confused,
confusion tend to happen,
we could work this out,
Dont say a word,
a hug will do,

Stop it, Stop saying Sorry,
its my fault for being a jerk,
its my fault to confront him,
tell me you still wanna do this,
we could work this out,

Are u afraid dat we dont last?
or are u afraid u'll hurt me?
or maybe both,
U wont hurt me if we slowly take our relationship.
but seems that i'm hurting u now.
I'm really sorry.

Guess i'm just the jerks out there,
hu doesnt give spaces to u,
doesnt worth it be with,
If i told u, i wouldnt confront them,
would u believe?
or maybe its just some empty words,
i mean wat i said,
Sorry. For everything..Everything...

Give me ur Hand, We'll walk this Road together

2007-03-16T17:45:00.000+06:30

Fear of hurting me,
Fear of doing the same as my ex did,
Fear that ure not worth it,
Fear of hurting ppl the way ppl hurt u before,
Fear of being treaten good,
Thats what ure afraid off,

I'll tell you,
Dont be afraid to hurt me,
ure not the same as my ex,
dont compare i tell you,
dont think ure not worth it,

You wont hurt me if we take it slow,
Let our feelings grow,
Then U wouldnt be afraid to hurt me,
cuz u noe u wont be like my ex,

Trust urself,
Trust me,
Trust us,
Give me your hand,
We'll walk this bumpy road together,

Faith is what u need,
Security is what you want,
Trust urself you're able to walk this road with me,
Trust urself you wont hurt me,
Trust urself, give some faith on it
Give some time to trust urself and this relationship we're having,

Pudding Love

2007-03-16T05:54:00.000+06:30

It was going so well, then something seems to be not right,
we were growing further and further away,
I noe ure confused but i act as tho i didnt know,
Space is what you need and what i'm giving to u,

Maybe i'm not good enough for u,
maybe u deserve someone better,
the fact dat u keep in touch with him now bothers me,
I'm afraid i'll lose you,
afraid to lose you one day,
afraid you wont return back to my arms,

Someone told me before,
if u hold on too tight,u'll strangle em
if u hold on too loose, they'll escape,
You have to hold on perfectly,

I dont want to end this,
This is just the ups and downs we're facing,
it won't break us apart easily,
Don't give up easily,
nothing could stop us,

Do i still have feelings for you?
Do i still miss you?
Thats your question,
that remains in ur heart,

Space is what you need and what i'm giving to u,
but at the end i hope ure right back in my arms,
back to where we left off,
tell me you're mine,
tell me you won't be going anywhere,
only right here in my arms,

We'll take it slow,
You think ure not good enough for me,
Baby,Dont think that way,
Just give it a lil time,

Feelings grow in time,
Patience is virtue,
but end of the day,
i just wanna say i love u.

To: Pudding From:Kancil Chai

Not Updated

2007-01-16T20:49:00.000+06:30

This blog is pretty much dead now..Cuz...i'm waiting for pictures from Tristo, of our reunion night and the akon night. So wont be updating until i get those pictures-.-"

Guitars

2007-01-09T18:22:00.000+06:30

Well... As u can see or heard from me. I'm a guitar freak. Yea i do play guitar but...i'm not good like the fast shredding guitarist herman li, or any close to paul gilbert(my idol) :]...i still havent been practicing those songs that we are suppose to jam at the end of this month. Buuutt...I'll show u some of me favourite guitars...and i noe u'll like them. Cuz....my taste :)...lets start from the less like to the most liked.

Number 6~

Platinum Virgo black. tried before. and its....Aaaaoooohhhh... Wonderfull. but not counted as the best :). Its a warlock shape. But wat do u expect from bcrich =/

Number 5~

Damien FR wif Floyd Rose. Schecter's Guitar. Yeap wif EMG pick ups....very nice shape i like the shape :). plus check out the designs on the neck board :)

Number 4~

Yes and finally My guitar now. I mean i have 2 but...i'll show this instead. Cuz the sound is freaking awesome. and the sustain is freaking fabulous. BUuuuutt... i fucked my bridge...so yea...its not so good like how it is. But, its still good.

Number 3~

Yeap yeap custom made guitar. Erm... Slipknot's guitarist.. the number 7 dude.. as u can see... his guitar got the word "Seven". :]. forgot wat was his name. I think its Mike Thompson. =/

Number 2~

synester gates' custom made guitar. U hear those riffs from avenged sevenfold, hear those guitar solos. All orginal from this guitar.

Number 1~

yes....my dream guitar.Pgm. on the left is Pgm is floyd rose. But...i would prefer the one on the right. wifout floyd Rose. :). Paul gilbert uses this guitar.

Anyway.. Dats all for now.

Guilty

2007-01-07T12:40:00.000+06:30

Well...y am i feeling guilty?... Hmm...okay...since i fought wif my parents i have been coming home late. When i should be preparing my for this semester. Saturday i went out with kea leng,min ern, and jia wei. we went and watch night at the museum and then after that went yam Cha in banana leaf at centerpoint.

Night at the Museum.
its a really funny. Worth the money. Altho there is some parts that doesnt make sense. I wont say it here. U have to ask me :).

After the yam cha-ing session we went Dj ...go cyber :). yes we are lifeless mutha fucks. Well theres nuthing to do. So we went cyber. And Came home around 4. Yeap. very late...

Yesterday, Went weiyang's house for his open house party thing. Yea it was fun. Drinking there. Then later the boys including me Invaded Weiyang's com. To check for porn :P. Ok just kidding. was checking on his computer games. :). and one of his computer games called VAmpire, had this picture of A really fucking hot vampire. As in she has top and bottom. well u noe wat i mean. Wearing those low cuts. very hot vampire indeed. So then theres this gurl...little gurl behind us....asking his mum wat was dat. then her mum said..lets go...this are boys stuff. Hahha....dam embarrasing wei. anyway..then after we watch Pulse. Ok..its a FUCKING SCARY SHOW...but the main actress was hot. mmhmm.. :]....steaming hot. hehe...sizzling hot....

then after dat me and jia wei meet min ern,bernard and his fren. hahah...cyber seesion again :P. and well wat do u noe...we went dj,and ss2 all the fucking cybers were fucking full. wa ta fak wei. We spend an hour plus looking for cybers and end up in AC instead. hahha so...again...we went back around 4.-.-. now feeling guilty. Feeling as tho my life is wasted. sigh. y dun i just sell vcd. Dun wanna burden my parents.

Band

2007-01-05T19:30:00.000+06:30

at last after searching high and low,mountains to rivers, cities to village, across the galaxy, me and jia wei finally found 2 people to join our band cause. to create musical fusion. in other words. Noise.

so yea..theres me,jia wei,jon ming, and chee sing. both found by jia wei. One is a singer and a guitarist and the other is a basist. So yea. We're gonna jam and test out see if we're good on 31st january. We jAmmm.
Gonna jam, Mae-Suspension,Weezer-Perfect Situation, Dashboard Confessional- Vindicated, Anberlin- Paperthin Hymm.

so...rite now...gonna practice my ass off to paly these songs. I dun wanna suck :(. Dun wan people to laugh at me. :(. Going start college next week. Actually it started this week. But for me, i'll make it a special case. i'll start next Week :]

For now, Practicing those 5 songs are my primary objective, i will not suck :). and i need to get my guitar fixed. the bridge is fucked. I cant use my bcrich to play this songs. Its so...out. lolz. Well u'll noe it if u seen my bcrich. But its a good guitar :]. and i like it.:]....till then.

Alive

2007-01-02T13:22:00.000+06:30

hmm. Havent been blogging for decades now. i feel so old. yes. i'm 18 now. everybody has turn 18 long time but i just happen to turn 18 now. and i feel proud :].

Anyway, i came back from japan on christmas eve. and it was at ngiht. suppose to go clubbing wif frens but i was too tired. cuz the whole day was sitting the aeroplane and my butt hurts. Japan was fun i guess. I went to Hokaido. Nope not tokyo. Been there before. But hokaido. Its most nice sceneries. Mountains,Hills, and Snow. Yes Snow people. I felt Snow in my whole entire life for the first time like how i came out to this world and take my 1st oxygen. and the gurls. uhh...they're either god dam hot or god dam ugly. theres no average. sorry to disappoint u dicks but yea. and the students working 2 time job. Morning student and at night prostitute. Well not all. Some at least. :)

Next, 28th johan's birthday,went clubbing in q bar. and i was out. nothing special. cant really remember wtf happen. so yea. it was fun.

30th sean's concert. ah hah.....well ok ler not bad. i like the guitarist :). he can own using an acoustics man. anyway. told jia wei to call jenn...hmm...yea.. cuz his book is wif her. but in the end she nvr pick up. probably she nvr even brought the book. Hmm.. right now..i wont say i miss her or i dont miss her...or i love her or i dont love her already. everything is the past. Shes gone. and i cant get it back or do anything about it. Cuz u noe y? she treats me as her worst nightmare. her worst enemy. yea.

31st. my birthday. went hartamas countdown. then went to kea leng's house and drink. we were palying this drinking game. like cards are given out and those hu get the biggest no need to drink. only the others drink. but of cuz..dats too much. we changed the rule to..the smallest card drinks. so yea...drink drink drink...and all get dam high and drunk. and next thing i noe i woke up wif a bump on my head and it hurts..plus wif the headache even makes things more uncomfortable. and dont forget i found lots of bruises on my body. as tho i got wacked.

sorry no pictures. cuz i didnt take pictures. =/ yea obviously.

Japan here i datang!

2006-12-17T15:57:00.000+06:30

Japan Here i come! Ka wa iii Komenaseeiiiii Yamateeeee gambattteee Kimochiii HITAI!

lolz...actually not excited about japan.. dunno y....argh... rawr...today and yesterday was fun...and soon...when my parents and the whole family EXCEPT ME...goes to singapore. freedom. yes. i can breath it already. mhmmm...

yesterday watch eragon. And its a fucknig dumb movie. fucking waste of money. I mean the story is ok...but not the best and not considered good. but average. But But...the dialog is fucking dumb. "Into the Sky, To Win or to Die!" wat kind of fuck line is dat. But oh well lets wait for the second part shall we.

Exams Over

2006-12-16T09:45:00.000+06:30

Yea..Woohoo finals Over...finally.

just over yesterday. then at nite went out wif kevin and johan. lolz. We talked dam alot of crap. Talk about wat fuck up relationship we had this whole year. we went ac. Drank. Cheers on gurls hu uses us. haha. dam we're sad. well life is like dat. if we're too nice people step over us. So we should be evil mean. :) hehe.

then ohmy god my god mygod. yesterday after my final paper. i went and fetch this 2 hot chicks.agrhgrhargha...they're fucking hot. haha. one of them is Nikki. Amanda's cousin. and the other is her fren. so yea. lalala. i use to talk to nikki alot. before iw ent ns. lolz.then i came back lost contact. and now talking back again. Dammm shes so gorgeous.Shiiittt lah..

there...isnt she cute. hahha. dam ler yesterday she wearing her prom dress. Arrghhh... so goddess. djlsajl;ewkgf....2 chicks in my car. dam scsared dam nervous. my palms were sweating. i cant turn the streeing wheel properly-.-" fuck llah

today going out wif my peeps to see star wars convention :)... yes me and jia wei loves star wars. So everybody have to bare wif us and come and see the convention :)....wahaha now dats evil *evil laugh*

Everything began in March.

2006-12-11T13:31:00.000+06:30

Rebound:
–verb (used without object)
1.
to bound or spring back from force of impact.
2.
to recover, as from ill health or discouragement.
3.
Basketball. to gain hold of rebounds: a forward who rebounds well off the offensive board. –verb (used with object)
4.
to cause to bound back; cast back.
5.
Basketball. to gain hold of (a rebound): The guard rebounded the ball in backcourt. –noun
6.
the act of rebounding; recoil.
7.
Basketball.
a.
a ball that bounces off the backboard or the rim of the basket.
b.
an instance of gaining hold of such a ball.
8.
Ice Hockey. a puck that bounces off the gear or person of a goalkeeper attempting to make a save. —Idiom
9.
on the rebound,
a.
after bouncing off the ground, a wall, etc.: He hit the ball on the rebound.
b.
after being rejected by another: She didn't really love him; she married him on the rebound.

the highlighted ones.
to recover from an illness or discouragement. in my situation. she would take me as a rebound. which means after sean rejected her she took me as a tool to recover from wat shes feeling. she wnated someone to pick her up. but from the start sean didnt say he didnt wan her. of cuz during when they just broke up. he didnt rejected her. But only later on he did. But she didnt realize dat she was taking me as a rebound. so it wasnt entirely her fault. she jsut didnt wanna accept the truth. Lolz. yup dats her alrite. cant accept the truth but dats wat makes her really cute. hahah.

Hmm i guess i did say sumthing wrong here dat inflicted much pain onto her. but i guess it doesnt matter. wat she do, wat she feel, wat she say, wat she think. is not my problem no more. cuz i'm not her ex. i wasnt together wif her before. i never did have anything wif her this whole year. lolz.
hmm...but anyhow she has always been the one hu took my heart away and never gave me back. but i noe i'm not worth it to have back my own heart. but however...she can hate me curse me do some black voodoo magic on me. i wouldnt careless. cuz i noe wat i have said. wat i ahve said before to her. i meant it. every single word. but she would treat it as tho its bullshity. fine by me. but like i said. i meant it.

This whole year have been a major depression and sorrow year. and it change me quite alot. i get angry fast. really fast. i dun seem to be my ownself like wat my frens told me. But people change dont they?.

Awesome Form of Target

2006-12-10T15:22:00.000+06:30

So yea me and johan last night created this awesome form....to give out to people....like whenever u find a target. find a new gurl. So this form will be given out to them.

1.Name:
2.Gender: (if male ur questionaires stops here)
3.Age:
4.Status: Single/Married/Opposite of Single

5.Do u club:Yes/No
6.Do u drink:Yes/No
7.Do u dirty dance wif guys when ure drunk: Yes/No (if yes ur questionaire stops here)
8.Are u crazy about going clubbing: yes/No (if yes ur questionaires stops here)
9.Are u the only child: yes/No (if yes again ur questionaires stops here)
10.Do u hug or let other guys hold u when ur bf is near?: Yes/ No (if yes again ur questionaires stops here)
11.Have u been in a relationship before?: Yes/No
12.How many ex boyfrens u have:
13.Have u took some of them as a rebound before? Yes/No (if yes pls burn this paper)
14.Have u ever love 2 guys at a time?
15.Do u mean half of the things u said? yes/No
16.If yes how do u explain all gurls sometimes dont mean wat they said and forgets:
17.Would u believe ur boyfren or ur frens more: (not depending on situation...on overall)
18.Would u just simply walk away from ur boyfren: Yes/No
19. When people say sumthing about u. do u say stuff like u Don't noe me at all and dont judge me?: yes/No (if yes pls eat this piece of paper)
20. Are u from Stella maris? :P (ok this is pure random but i just hate stella maris ppl altho i was. i mean PUURE stella maris ppl :P:P:P- Randomnessss)

lolz...quite free loh yesterday..make such forms. then johan saw the gurl he liked in mcdonald. she got bf d. he dam upset. couldnt finish his burger. then i chill wif him until like 11 sumthing. and now i have to study history. and hopefully i dun fall asleep. If i do i wanna see her in my dreams.

Battle of the bands

2006-12-09T13:26:00.000+06:30

Wednesday night went out to cyber wif min ern, ian and jia wei.. had fun. But ian gotta went back early. suxorz. then last night. friday night. me ian jia wei went to curve watch battle of the bands. fucking awesome. Theres this band called "Ben's bitches".. man their song lyrics are fucking funny. like "Aku suka Jolok", "Amber Chia" haha....funny guys. lots of chicks. saw puiyi there. actually no didnt see her there. but jia wei saw her. then i'm like finding for her. rawr. the hotness. and yea lots of hot chicks. but my eyes were all concentrated on to Zack Kim's guitar. Pgm. the one paul gilbert uses. argh...i wan dat guitar.

haih...i'm just another "yi hong" to her. ian ask me to kau and get a gurl which everything jennifer is not. a gurl hu is better than her. i told him i dun wanna get involve in a relationship d. i jsut got no confidence already. after wat she have done. i find everything fake. fake fake fake. fucking fake. no confidence to be in a relationship anymore. maybe i'm jsut scared they will just treat me as a rebound again. cheat me. haih. then ian say datts y u have to find good gurls. hu ask u to find gurls like her. then i continue eating my maggi mee.haha

and i payback. revenge on him. by saying Heyyy iAn isnt dat the gurl u say just now dam hot and u were checking out on her...dam loud while hes on the phone wif his gurlfren. whahakak.. but his gf also another cunning lingus fish steak. she wont let him hang out wif his frens at nite. everytime also when she call ask him go back..then he will go back. if he doesnt she gets angry. dats y i say gurls are just fucking troublesome single minded one way think selfish minds cunt face. maybe this time i jsut be a fucker hu get together wif a gurl just to fuck her lah. no strings attached. dun wanna get commited. since in the end they treat us back like shit. k good. i should do dat. made a deal wif johan. since he also agree...akaka...but too bad he got a target which hes commited. grrr...oh well...just wait for the right one. be holy like jia wei :D. Anyway last night, ian's gf kept calling him. then i kinda like got pissed wif ian. cuz y she dun let him hang out wif us. assss man. so he nvr pick up her phone. hahah....until she got jia wei's number. holy fuck how she got jia wei's number. hahah.. but jia wei smart...also nvr pick up. cuz we noe its yun zhen calling...akaka...then on the way back in the car ian call back gave excuse say he cant hear his phone calling XD...hahaha..owned. anyway...dats all chowz

Religion

2006-12-07T19:14:00.000+06:30

In your faces SUper Hyper Duper religious bastards hu mind trick freethinkers like me to join ur pathetic cause.

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-1333785445421925818

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=1986014567979609861

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-6470692109062598615

lolz....well gonna be busy these few days..next week finals. yea.. today dam depressed..actuaally starting last 2 days... been thinking of her alot ... thinking those stuff she said to me last time. and reading wat she said on the e-mail just made me think watever she said last time was lies. feeling fooled. but if u really ask me...i dunno how to answer. i dunno wat to answer. i still miss her. i still like her. i dun wanna be angry. i dun wanna love her either. i wanna stop. but its just so hard. when i thoguht i could move on. i cant stop thinking of her. maybe her frens, her cousin and EVEN HEr would say, i'm feeling hurt now its the same as when i do and said stuff dat hurt her last time when we're together. well its totally different. TO her it was just lies. i will say again. a rebound. me....after sean. she once said i'm special to her. lolz. i wanna stop believing those words. i do..i want to stop believing. but i have to accept the truth. how special she is to me? so special dat i would love her to the very end. how special is she to me now? very special dat i would still love and have her in my heart but don't wanna have to do anything wif her for now. how much i wanna hear her voice. how much i wanna see her in fornt of me. how much i wish those times were real. through wat i read ...erm..from her blog....seems dat shes doing fine. trying to forget about sean. but at the same time shes wanting sean to talk to her. "he told me..im always in his heart and all.but yet..he doesnt keep intouch wit me...well.maybe he forgot i actualyl exsist..or maybe..he just plain dun care...gosh...how stupid am i..he got over his ex for 9 months in 3 month??" yup...how much she wans sean to talk to her now.

oh and the best part..she even say "far away" was a normal love song to her now.haih...seems dat shes totaly forgot i existed..haha..like i said just now....i'm not special to her...those were lies. dats all now...going jia wei's house to watch movie.

Inventions

2006-12-03T21:24:00.000+06:30

As you all noe. we all live in a modern world now. and each day new things are produce. and we call this inventions. invention invented by inventious mind people. these people are very creative, smart and also quite free. in other words they got nuthing better else to do. They dont work they dont do crime but they invent stuff. And most of these people are from japan. Lets take a look at their greatest inventions.

This is whre u put ur credit cards,sewing kits, scissors, money and everything from ur wallet. its kind a decoy thing to trick robbers and pick pockets. Cuz they wouldnt check ties. But they will strip u.

I dunno wat is this but its a vertigo soothing glasses. its just fashion. make u look cooler. let u have a bigger eyes. For japanese bigger eyes means cute rite? just look at their anime for example. anything big means NICE.

Now for this. its obviously for lazy fuckheads hu cant hold an umbrella. or poor lil ladies who didnt get any kind helping hand to hold an umbrella from men.

Our streets arent safe anymore. So many toxic gas. So use of one this. A Fresh Air Mask. Pure Oxygen straight from the plants itself.

Personal rain saver. just another invention to save water.

Now this is fucknig ugly. but i'm guessing its use to scare rapist and perverted wolves away.

This is specially for the ladies while ure eating ur noodles. Dont get ur hair dirty. or ur love ones wont go near u anymore. But i would. so call me *wink*

U got flu?. Just pull a tissue right from the top of ur head.

No cash to buy a lighter? Use the natural resource dat we have.

From left to Right:

-Sharp phone car charger

-Special toothbrush that you suppose to press a wonderfull button while brushing, then you will notice dat u will need not go to see a dentist anymore. So i urge all kids hu hate going to the dentist. To buy this.

-Toothbrush refill kit

-Special Comb that will make u lose less hair in a day and in the same time will let u grow more hair. I wouldnt buy it and use it. Scare later i might look like a Bear below and scare all the chicks away.

-Donald Duck Cup :)

Dont have an I-pod? nvm present to u I - Swing

I- Cock

I- BooB

I- Butt

Deep and Meaningless

2006-12-02T19:17:00.000+06:30

I, I don't know why I miss you so much
Yeah I, I don't know why I still feel your touch
You, you left me feeling high and dry
With nothing, nothing but the question why

Yeah you, I guess you had another direction
And leaving me with nothing but a dead connection

If you call me today
I'll say that I'm fine
But I bet you can tell by the tone of my voice
It's just a lie
You knew what you had
You still walked away leaving me in this mess
My love for you is deep and meaningless

You, you knew what you were doing to me
And I, I guess I was too blind to see
Well you hit where it hurt and you fooled me so bad
But I'd do it again to relive what we had
(Damn that's sad)

There are many things left to remind me
Of a love that I just can't leave behind me

If you call me today
I'll say that I'm fine
But I bet you can tell by the tone of my voice
It's just a lie
You knew what you had
You still walked away leaving me in this mess
My love for you is deep and meaningless

Busy Eyes Broken Heart

2006-12-01T16:05:00.000+06:30

Yesterday was a good prom. I think. Its in Q-bar. well not many people. so it was not really dat happening. And quite boring instead. But not until our lil good local band came along. Disagree. Yup. Dam their live performances are like fucking good compare to other bands i saw in KL jam Asia in hartamas. And of cuz....daayuummm dawg....the gurls were hot. haha. Busy eyes. :D. Cheryl is dam hot. haha. and natalie... mhhm mhmm...dam BuBu. U lucky guy. German chicks are just so hard to resist. took pictures with them. But now i dont have it with me. I need to ask them send it to me yeap. taking pictures with them just make my day. I'm so honored to stand next to theses goddess. :D. I'll post cheryl's picture here later. Need to get those pictures from here. And later Sean u will see and u will slowly regret for not coming. Cheryl was just puuuurrrfect :D. Too bad for sean :). Overall the prom was fun. not bad i guess. lots of laughter. and eyes were dam busy.

But however not so busy when i went maison wif hann. mhmm...shhiiat dawwg. Maison was overcrowded yea. overcrowded. but the good thing is. The percentage of bumping and passing thru a really hot chick is dam high. and i see lots of college frens there. Me and Alex were very busy drinking and walknig around scooping for chicks. yea drinking. JD wif coke. i like it. U noe y?u noe y?. cuz i taste coke more than the JD itself :P. dats y i like it. hehe. Then ordered redbull vodka. mhmm. dats the bomb. didnt drink much cuz i'm driving. until now I have nvr been drunk. So i dunno my limits. so better not drink so much :)Hann couldnt join us cuz he had to bring in his frens into the club. Well U noe ler ..hann so many contacts. a powerful man wif a powerful car :D. haha. So yea me and alex walking around. i saw lots of couples. Hmm are they really couples? or just random people trying to get funkay. anyway reminds me of me and jenn during the merdeka thing in hartamas. In breakers. So yea. but useless thinking back those old times heh. She wont possible come back to me. lolz. but nvm its ok. at elast me and jae seung were dancing wif chicks there. haha. hu cares if u cant dance. its a club. just bounce around will do :D. but dayummm. dat chick me and jae seung was dancing wif..is H-O-T. like hot stuff. sizzling hot. So yea dam tired today. Dam sleepy. Pictures i'll post it the next time i update it. Until then.

To Someone who i love so much.

2006-11-27T18:48:00.000+06:30

Seindah tiada lagi kau ku ingatkan
Sayang kau hilang
Menanti biar sampai akhir hayat ku di dunia ini
Kau tahu bertapa ku sayang padamu
Hanya bidadari sebagai ganti
Hanya takdir menentukan ia
Oh belaian jiwa
Oh angin, sampaikan lagu ku padanya
yang sedih pilu
Terimalah lagu ku jadi teman hidup mu
Untuk selamanya
Kau tahu bertapa ku sayang padamu
Hanya bidadari sebagai ganti
Hanya takdir
Menentukan ia
Oh belaian jiwa

Lies~

2006-11-26T11:12:00.000+06:30

Hmm...yea..i'm angry...so wat?...all this while i thought...altho i noe she loves sean but when we're together....its all lies...shes deceiving those times. its all god dam fucking lies. i'm just a dick rebound asshole mutha fuck. i ask her before...beore we got together...if shes talking me a rebound she say no. Fine i believe her. Now..har har...different story d. and its part of my fault?...hahah...wooohooo..yea...sorry for telling Liessss to her....disapppointing her....WHILE we were together which i thoghut was real. but its not huh. hahah...fuck this lah...yea altho at the same time i'm happy dat she finally noes wat she wan. haih....she thought i backstabed her?..hhahaa...screw it lah....i nvr even tell wat happen to my closest frens. only people i told is...ermm...wai xiang...cheryl i think-.-...and sean?...wait did i tell sean-.-...shit cant remember....even jia wei weiyang also i nvr tell them...even ian...cuz i dun wan my really really close frens to say anything bad about her...cuz it mgiht hurt me..or maybe cause a fight...between us...and she thinks i backstab her....haiyah..screw it...watever she thinks non of my businesss...i cant love her anymore....but i dun hate her at the same time now...she was jsut confused..that all this stuff happenned....from the start my frens have been saying stuff about her...but i nvr listen...cuz i was so in love wif her...dat watever she do is always right. but....i'm just taking for granted?...is dat the word...maybe its a lil bit too harsh...a rebound. guess all this long....wat we had....was all lies...an illusion....guess i've also been lieing to myself...cant love her anymore...but it doesnt matter to her huh...if i lvoe or dont love....its not like i can bring her back to my life anymore...well yea...its my fault all along also i guess....if i didnt fall in love wif her...this wouldnt happen...if i didnt confront her telling her dat i love her...this wouldnt happen....she and sean would be happily together.sigh...

oh last nite went out wif iann and gang...went cyber-.- play until 2.00 this morning..haha...and now is 12.50...in the afternoon...:]....shit dog...jia wei is getting good in DoW...rawrr..i suc-.-...

Usefull knowledge

2006-11-23T18:36:00.000+06:30

woo..finally....finish all my projects d...for this week at least-.-.. sigh...next week got quiz and history test...haih..no time to sleep somemore...somemore i'm broke-.-. Used my last money to buy ciggrates. aiks. now my wallet got erm. 13 cents. dunno where i got the 3 cents from. anyway...i noe how to put pictures d but today i wont pictures i will put some "important" information for all ladies. :). i wont say hu send this little "information" to me cuz its kinda private :]..hehe...learn a lil bit of knowledge....so anyway...check it out. and lastly, dont read it if ure under 18. :)

yea a bit random here....but just look at this....funny rite...i mean just stare at his face for 30 seconds....or maybe more...i'm sure u will laugh

12 Orgasm Tips

1. Work on your pelvic floor muscles

Prepare for multitudes of earth-shattering orgasms by whipping your PC muscles into shape. To know what and where they are, next time you're on the loo, try stopping yourself peeing mid-flow. The muscles you clench up to stop yourself urinating are the PC muscles. The best bit about getting them fit and healthy is that you don't need to don footless tights and haul yourself to the gym – you can exercise them by clenching and unclenching them several times during a day. Spend a couple of weeks 'working out' and you'll find yourself having more, and better, orgasms

2. Relax

It sounds obvious, but you're unlikely to have a great orgasm if you're tense or stressed out. Light candles, have a bath, or go for a tension-busting walk and your chances of reaching orgasm are instantly increased. Just remember to avoid alcohol, which can numb the nerve endings in your vagina and make orgasm more difficult

3. Give your man a helping hand

Give yourself an orgasm head start by masturbating before you have sex. Some women find their pubic mound, nipples or inner thigh particularly sensitive... explore your own body and work out what works for you. Stroke, rub and caress yourself for a few minutes before your partner does and prepare for the Big O!

4. Get on top An oldie but a goodie!

Straddling your man means that you can take control of how fast, slow, or deep you want it, and watching him watch you can be a real turn-on as well. Position yourself on top of him and wiggle around a little so that your clitoris is in direct contact with his body, and try rotating your hips in slow circles to achieve an amazing orgasm

5. Have sex during your period ( WTF?!?!?!!!!oneone!!1111!1!!@1one!!)

If you feel the yuck-factor is too high on this one, wait until your menstrual flow is at its lowest – towards the end of your period – to minimise the 'I've been shot where it hurts' look for your bloke. All the abdominal muscles and nerve endings are at their most sensitive during your period, which can make for some pretty explosive orgasms. And as a bonus, sex is a sure-fire painkiller if you're prone to nasty cramps

6. Try a variation on the doggy position

If he's especially well-endowed, try lying face down on a firm surface and have him enter you from behind. If you raise your hips a fraction and slip either yours, or his hand in underneath your body, you (or he) can stimulate your clitoris at the same time. This variation on doggy-style combines pressure from the front and the back and it feels pretty damn good!

7. Use lubricant

Sex can sometimes be less comfortable or enjoyable when your vagina is dry. This can happen at the beginning or end of your cycle, or if you've just removed a tampon to have sex. However, a touch of dryness can be easily remedied with one of the many lubrication products available on the market. Lube is also a great orgasm aid – a drop or two applied to the vaginal entrance will make sex more sensual for both or you, and with a bit of luck, more orgasmic

8. Try using a vibrator

Use a vibrator either on your own or with your partner – to achieve orgasm. Have your bloke sit on his knees (so that he can balance) and penetrate you while simultaneously stimulating your clitoris with a vibrator. It feels amazing...

9. Indulge in some oral pleasure

Most men don't need any encouragement to head downstairs - oral sex can be just as pleasurable for the man performing it as it is for the women receiving it. Encourage your bloke to gently lick, suck or nibble on your clitoris – whatever feels great – and then ask him to insert one or two fingers into your vagina so that he can stroke the very sensitive inner wall (where the g-spot is often located). Some women also find that having their perineum licked or a short-nailed finger inserted into their anus results in great orgasms

10. Invest in some adult entertainment

Ask a female staff member at your closest sex store to recommend a film that is especially erotic for women, and try watching it with your partner. You'll soon stop feeling freaked out at the sight of other people getting it on, and start encouraging your bloke to replicate some of the moves you're seeing on screen. Orgasms... here we come!

11. The modified missionary position

You don't need any fancy equipment for this orgasm booster... Lie on your back and put your legs over your partner's shoulders. Lifting your legs like this allows for easier clitoral contact and is also a goodie for stimulation of the g-spot. This position is practically orgasm-guaranteed

12. Stop worrying!

Many women fear that they are taking too long to orgasm or that their blokes get bored of the repetitive motions that are sometimes required for a woman to come. The more you fret, the more likely you are to fake... and that's not good for anybody. Enjoy all the sensations of sex and don't be concerned if you don't always orgasm – sex can be just as pleasurable for both parties without orgasms

So yea...here are good tips for intimate couples....yep yep....to have a really good pleasuring time for both sides :) :).... this isnt a porn site...its just good knowledge.. :)...tee hee tee hee

Depressing Emoing Day

2006-11-20T19:39:00.000+06:30

This Time, This Place
Misused, Mistakes,
Too long, Too Late,
Who was I to make you wait,
Just one chance,
Just one Breath,
Just in case there's just one left
Cause you know,
you know, you know

That I love you,
I have love you all along,
And i Miss you,
Been far away for far too long,
I keep dreaming you'll be with me
and you'll never go
Stop breathing if
i don't see you anymore

On my knees, I'll ask
Last chance for one last dance
'Cause with you, I'd withstand
All of hell to hold your hand
I'd give it all
I'd give for us
Give anything but I won't give up
'Cause you know,
you know, you know

So far away
Been far away for far too long
So far away(So far away)
Been far away for far too long
But you know,
you know, you know

I wanted
I wanted you to stay
'Cause I needed
I need to hear you say
That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I forgive you
For being away for far too long
So keep breathing
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore
believe it
Hold on to me and, never let me go
So keep breathing
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore
believe it
Hold on to me and, never let me go

hey donnie this is another part of the testi!!sorrie..not enuf charcter!!ehe...so..anwyays..u'll b in ns port dickson like this sunday..fer 3 whole months!!!shyt la!!!i freaking gonna miss u like hell!!!sigh...=(...i wan u to remeber this..to matter wut...no amtter how long and how far..u'll still b my number one aight..!!=)..smiles!!ehe..take care wen ure in ns!!ook..ahhh!!...i think u noe what song the lyrics from ryt..meant it though!!=Du take care aight...hope to c you before u leave...muaksss!!lurrrvee ya loads!!muakssss!!hugggiess!!~jen~06

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hmm....this is a testimonial i found in my profile. just now. she send it to me. Before i went ns. hmm, every single word in this song it just mean so much. some people might dun understand wats the lyrics about. But if u havent been into dat position u wont noe wat it actually meant.

the one i bold-ed on top there...yea...."no amtter how long and how far..u'll still b my number one aight..!!=).." hmm...she said dat. number one heh. how about sean? isnt he number one. since she have been saying this to me all this while when we were together. but i dont blame her. i dont blame her at all

i guess this website is right. http://www.intellectualwhores.com/ladderintro.html
i mean...in this website woman say stuff dat they dont mean it sometimes. haha

thinking wat billy said to me...she still likes me...but dont like my attitude...the anger management thing...Hmm. i thoguht when u love someone u would accept who they are. guess she dont really love me all along. lolz. my frens ask me if i still like her. yea i do. i really do.

she didnt go for the prom. 3 empty seats on her table. hmm...where could she go?...clubbing?hartamas? ac?

Anyway...sorry for today's post...very emo...i'm trying to make this blog interesting....still fidning ways to put musics...and soon i'll be writting comments about alot of other stuff..movies...and create some shitty stuff...yea...it willb e ineteresting i guarantee :)....and also learning how to put pictures-.-

A Big Load has been taken off my Chest

2006-11-19T16:53:00.000+06:30

aahh.. at last just finished my history book review. its 6.23 now. haha took me 5 hours to finish. -_-. wanna noe wats the book about? i write it down here till 7 pages BUT since its too lnog and u'll get bored out of it...i wont. but seriously tis a dam boring book. about politics. The Prince by Nicolo Michiavelli.

going to go gym later. johan keep asking me to go this whole week d. i told him i'm busy. 1st grandma hospital then after dat need to finish all this last minute projects. sigh. gonna meet up wif him at 7.30.

last month nvr go gym the whole month. the puasa month. Now going back to gym i feel so weaakk. Body achings. sigh. Must make myself strong strong abit.then next time can really wack those people hu are bigger size than me. =)

Plus i need to dota also. rawr. yesterday dota wif sean. sean didnt host. dam sean u feed when u lag. :P. and i gotta find nicer templates. mine is the same as sean's and xiang's-.-. must find ncier than them. =D. *giggle giggle*

but of cuz i didnt just do work today. After so long i touched my guitar again. Since since i left my dam amp in weiyang's house-_-. very lazy to take it back.so dam blardy big. and heavy. learned how to play lips of an angel today. yea. can play whole song d. except solo. solo didnt learn. i wanna jam badly. rawr~sean promise me we will jam after his exams :( i wonder when he will fulfill my dreams :(..and jia wei still ahvent find me a singer :( weiyang...U MUTHA FUCKING CUNT,...i HAteee UuuUuuUuU....u DICK insulter!....ass-ness...Grrr Roar...dun make me do things to yvonne =D....

hmm actually today i really felt like calling her talk to her. but i guess the same thing would happen again. i mean she wont talk to me. but oh well haha shes having a good time now.

Am i being used? i mean when we were together. does she just wanna make sean jealous. Hmm..i'm starting to wonder. but now sean told me he dun wanna have anything to do wif her anymore. yea i should too. its like one minute she say she misses me..other minutes she talks about hsiang other minute she say she misses sean... haha..shes quite confused and unstable. He say shes fake? i dun really understand wat dat means. haha...but i'll just play along...akaka..:P...just kidding...i understand. but anyway for now next week gonna be relaxing for me now. no more history project..Woohoo..~

Boring Day

2006-11-18T13:36:00.000+06:30

So now second post and still trying to find ways to shove songs into this perfectly design blog. But still i have to divide my time to play dota and my new sexy game, Dawn of War Dark Crusade. and also most importantly do my history book project -_-. which is due on monday. Sigh crap. I'm so screwed I have no idea wat to write on this assignment. Teacher ask us to Read King Henry the 8th book and do a review for it

Like i will go and read the dam book. stupid book. All i noe about king Henry is dat he has lots of wife and is related to some religious christian thing i think-.- and oh yah fought wif the pope in rome or italy. -_- watever my history. I sleep in classes.

Y must it be King Henry. Y not Alexander The great? i would say hes a gay whore who is gaying wif his lil gay asistant. Not so great after all. hmm.

i went ou. Saw her in watson. Wif jonz. lolz..u noe wat..it doesnt matter if i'm sad or heart broken now. It doesnt matter already. As long she finds her happiness. Its hard to see someone u love when u cant be with them. i guess she will understand dat too. It goes same for her towards sean. Yea.

Thats all for today now.

Hey New blog

2006-11-17T20:46:00.000+06:30

Since everybody has a blogspot. i shall create one so that i'm not a social outcast :)
ok erm i'm starting to get use to this now. gimme some time and i'll make this blog nicer :). More yeng. yea.